Who I am Today vs Who I was...
When I first graduated high school and moved out to Burbank, California, I was a completely different person then, than I am now. Hell, I am a different person from who I was a year ago.
The things I wanted in life were surrounded by the materialistic, and the need to be around and liked by everyone. I loved being the center of attention and having expensive things. I wanted to act and be famous, have a huge house, nice cars, just things... things... things.... And I wasn't happy. I was convinced that having nice material items around me, and tons of friends would bring me the happiness I was so desperately looking for. I was facing an eating disorder and borderline depression... So I made the decision to move back home.
Even when I first moved home, moved out with my best friend (Hi Jaquoi) I wasn't happy. I was still in the same state of mind and I felt trapped in this constant loop of wants feeling like needs, getting them confused in my mind. I was around people that brought me down, I was abusing substances to try and make myself feel happy, even for just a moment...but this too, needed to change.
When I first got Aleu, I will admit right now, I was not the best dog mom, and I still had a lot to learn. A LOT. But instead of giving up and rehoming her, I made the conscious decision to work and grow as a dog owner, and let Aleu teach me more about life and being in a state of comfortability that I had previously known. I started to get outside with her everyday that I could, and the happiness and smiles on her face brought me more joy than I had felt in a long time, and it was in those moments where I slowly learned that, as cliche as it sounds, the best things in life are truly free. Those moments spent with my girl just us two in the mountains, getting fresh air, and bonding with one another really helped me recover and grow. Starting my transition into who I am today.
Kyra came into the picture because I wanted Aleu to have a friend, and I felt like we needed one more member to our pack. That dog is the most loving dog I have ever met. She constantly wants to be loved, to cuddle, to be near you, and her forever happy puppy face smile never fails to warm my heart.
Now, the wants and needs in my life are surrounded by all things involving adventure. I crave fresh air and the sense and desire of being outdoors. I seek those moments of uncertainty in the middle of nowhere, when things don't always go according to plan, the spontaneity of life when you're on an adventure. I have my dogs and my love by my side, and I am continuously growing and changing everyday, figuring out and sorting the wants and needs... finding a balance in what I want to be and where I want to be. I have grown and changed so much in these last few years, I am a happier person all around, I enjoy the little things in life, and I always want to lift people up with me on this journey of self love and positivity.
Key photo taken by the talented Kristen Frasca, check out her photography page!